Post by silverteardrops on Jan 6, 2007 2:10:27 GMT -5
First off Hello!
I'm new here and I'm a 16year old from Australia
how to start... running from the bad things in my life has become my norm and its starting to really effect me but I don't know what to do.
You see, ...okay an example... when I was in grade 9 one of the boys from my school decided that it was alright to finger me and to feel me up.
I should have told someone however this boy knew that he could do it to me and I wouldnt tell anyone because I was scared and because he knew things about me not many other people knew.
We were in the same classes five days a week for a year and then he changed schools and although he was gone, I still had those lingering memories and so I moved school.
Now at this school, I have some older guy friends who think its alright to do this again to me and its making me just feel like hiding away.
I have told people. One person didn't believe me (a teacher) and another (a close friend from church) wanted to tell the police (because these boys are 18 years old now) but I can't let that happen because I see them as friends still.
I don't have alot of really close friends at this school (the one I know best I have only known for a year and thats because of church and other things) but the ones I do know are kinda worried about me, and I can see why after they explained it.
I have been drawing back alot into myself, whilst I normally am quite loud and out there (hey! rowing doesnt help! lol.) and I just seem to be constantly out of it.
The thoughts have crossed my mind about cutting but I have been working really had the last 6months to get out of that habit and I really don't want to fall back into that cycle because it is really hard to get out.
I suppose what I really am wonder is what I can do, that wont get them into trouble.
and how i can get over this. because everytime a guy (even a guy I /know/ is a friend goes to touch me (even just a hug) i cringe away, but theres a part within me that just wants them to touch me more and more... and its really just sickening to think about.
thankyou
I'm new here and I'm a 16year old from Australia
how to start... running from the bad things in my life has become my norm and its starting to really effect me but I don't know what to do.
You see, ...okay an example... when I was in grade 9 one of the boys from my school decided that it was alright to finger me and to feel me up.
I should have told someone however this boy knew that he could do it to me and I wouldnt tell anyone because I was scared and because he knew things about me not many other people knew.
We were in the same classes five days a week for a year and then he changed schools and although he was gone, I still had those lingering memories and so I moved school.
Now at this school, I have some older guy friends who think its alright to do this again to me and its making me just feel like hiding away.
I have told people. One person didn't believe me (a teacher) and another (a close friend from church) wanted to tell the police (because these boys are 18 years old now) but I can't let that happen because I see them as friends still.
I don't have alot of really close friends at this school (the one I know best I have only known for a year and thats because of church and other things) but the ones I do know are kinda worried about me, and I can see why after they explained it.
I have been drawing back alot into myself, whilst I normally am quite loud and out there (hey! rowing doesnt help! lol.) and I just seem to be constantly out of it.
The thoughts have crossed my mind about cutting but I have been working really had the last 6months to get out of that habit and I really don't want to fall back into that cycle because it is really hard to get out.
I suppose what I really am wonder is what I can do, that wont get them into trouble.
and how i can get over this. because everytime a guy (even a guy I /know/ is a friend goes to touch me (even just a hug) i cringe away, but theres a part within me that just wants them to touch me more and more... and its really just sickening to think about.
thankyou