Erla
Cool User
[ss:BlueTwilight]
Posts: 129
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Parents
Apr 20, 2006 19:20:04 GMT -5
Post by Erla on Apr 20, 2006 19:20:04 GMT -5
For those here who do or have cut themselves, do your parents know?
If so, how did they find out? And how did they react then? If not, could you imagine telling them?
I was just wondering cause I do cut and tonight I was in the living room, watching 13 (the movie) and mum was there, too, and there was a scene where a girl was cutting and my mother looks up, raises an eyebrow and says "Lovely" like it's something really distasteful....
I just can't imagine how she'd react if she saw my cuts and scars....
All comments appreciated
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Parents
Apr 20, 2006 20:04:30 GMT -5
Post by [Taboo] on Apr 20, 2006 20:04:30 GMT -5
my dad dosent know so i dont think i would be of any help.
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Apr 20, 2006 22:33:02 GMT -5
Post by Rachel on Apr 20, 2006 22:33:02 GMT -5
Ive only cut once (the other day) but ive self harmed for over a month on and off. My parents dont know of course,and i think if my mum found out,she would somehow blame herself and feel guilty and hurt that i took this way to relieve my pain.
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Parents
Apr 21, 2006 1:52:11 GMT -5
Post by -‰KillerStyle‰- on Apr 21, 2006 1:52:11 GMT -5
I couldn't imagine telling a family member or even a friend really. I think my family would condem me and think Im possessed. But thats them for ya. I would tell them ever. All parents are different though
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Parents
Apr 21, 2006 2:21:41 GMT -5
Post by Rachel on Apr 21, 2006 2:21:41 GMT -5
I think my mum would be supportive of me,but at first would be stunned i would even do such a thing. My dad would probably just wonder why i do it,and think im mental or something..
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Parents
Apr 21, 2006 21:13:12 GMT -5
Post by vy on Apr 21, 2006 21:13:12 GMT -5
Dear Erla:
I don't cut myself, but my parents sure act like I do: scars on your hands!! Oh my gosh....umm, it's A PAPER CUT. All parents tend to over react from time to time, but they usually have our best interest in mind.
So usually when they find out, they do the whole parent scream, and dance thing (as I like to call it). However, they never stop loving you, and would usually get over the whole blame themselves ("where did I go wrong, and etc...") to find a way to help you.
I can't imagine telling my parents, if I did cut. But I would probably do it anyways. Since, I tell them everything, because even though they annoy me, I respect them. It is a matter of respecting and trusting one another - so I do it out of respect.
Well, if you cut, there will be scars - and that is what I think is a give away. I'm sure you have good reason for not telling, but how come you don't want her to know? (insert your thought to this question here.)
...exactly! So many choices in life: everyone is different. However, if it is harming you or hurting you - I suggest reconsidering other options.
(P.S. Sorry if I am rambling, I am extremely bored.)
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Parents
Apr 21, 2006 21:22:27 GMT -5
Post by Rachel on Apr 21, 2006 21:22:27 GMT -5
I do respect my mum,but telling her that i have started to SH would be terrible. I cant even imagine telling my mum,i really dont know what reaction i would get. But..saying that,theres a feeling inside me thats wants my mum to know,i think its like an urge to get attention and help to be honest. Because im so lost and hurt.. Plus not all cutters get scars (some are lucky not to) But when i do think about it,how can a parent NOT find out sooner or later? If a child cuts alot during teenage life,then gets through it,they've still got the marks on themselves to give it away and as a reminder. So how can a parent now realise what there child used to do? But it obviously does happen,cos ive heard of older people self harming and nobody knowing..soo..
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Erla
Cool User
[ss:BlueTwilight]
Posts: 129
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Parents
Apr 21, 2006 21:24:42 GMT -5
Post by Erla on Apr 21, 2006 21:24:42 GMT -5
Thanks all, for the replies. Well, as for why I don't want my mom to know...I just don't think she'd react very well. We don't really talk a lot...I mean serious talk... Mum also seems to think that it's unthinkable that I would do it... She doesn't even seem to notice that anything's wrong. She has more than once seen me just break down and cry and she doesn't even think about it. I'm pretty sure I could walk around with my arms completely bare and she wouldn't notice anything
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Parents
Apr 22, 2006 0:33:16 GMT -5
Post by Rachel on Apr 22, 2006 0:33:16 GMT -5
God thats just like me!! I never ever show my emotions to my mum,i always act happy and chirpy when im around her. But once i was just feeling down cos her boyfriend was here (used to be my step-father,but they divorced) and he was telling tales about me to my real dad! They were both in the kitchen with the door shut,while mum was in the room,i came downstairs and heard him saying how ungreatful i am and stuff like that,i said to my mum that if he didnt shut up,i was gonna do something to him cos he was peeing me off,and then just cried. She was surprised that i cried cos i never do it,and said 'do you need to see a doctor or something rachel?' and i said 'what the hell for?' and she said 'cos you never cry' lol shes clueless But 5 minutes later,my crying fit was forgotten and was never mentioned again.
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Parents
Apr 22, 2006 2:14:35 GMT -5
Post by Sparkle on Apr 22, 2006 2:14:35 GMT -5
When my parents found out? They cried, and sent me to a doctor, saying I was very ill. And every time they find out I've done it again? They bring my psychiatrist appointment forward.
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Erla
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[ss:BlueTwilight]
Posts: 129
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Parents
Apr 22, 2006 11:43:38 GMT -5
Post by Erla on Apr 22, 2006 11:43:38 GMT -5
Sparkle, how did your parents find out?
My stepdad just found out about 2 hours ago that I cut >.< He just saw my arm accidentally when we were at the gym (we always go together). He just mentioned it lightly when he saw it and I was like 'hehe'. Awkward.
But then when we were walking out he said "If I were you I'd tell your mum before she finds out, cause she will freak out if she finds out by herself. My mother would have if she would've found out."
I doubt he'll tell mum. And he obviously did it too. I'm not that surprised. He used to party a lot, drink, do drugs. The whole package. And he just talked to me about it, it's no secret.
I just don't know if I can tell mum. I don't really want to either.... *sigh* But I guess he's right. She'll probably take it slightly better if I tell her....I just don't know how to tell her, and I'm afraid of how she may react...>.<
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lilcrazygirl
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HOLAZ!!![ss:EmphemSkin][ss:Purple][ss:Purple]
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Apr 22, 2006 14:33:17 GMT -5
Post by lilcrazygirl on Apr 22, 2006 14:33:17 GMT -5
Well, my only advice to you about this is that you should ask your step-father how to talk to her. If you really don't want to do that then try to settle your mom down. Just with you and her (and maybe your step-dad since he already knows....and he could calm your mom down too if she did anything....but you should be able to figure out what she'll do or not.) Like, go to a dinner or something. Or just talk to her in her room or your room or any other good quiet place in the house. Hope that helped!!
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Parents
Apr 22, 2006 15:12:51 GMT -5
Post by Sparkle on Apr 22, 2006 15:12:51 GMT -5
My head of year told them... a couple of girls in my class saw, and where 'worried.' Yeah right. They hated me, so wanted to make my life a misery.
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Erla
Cool User
[ss:BlueTwilight]
Posts: 129
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Parents
Apr 22, 2006 16:33:59 GMT -5
Post by Erla on Apr 22, 2006 16:33:59 GMT -5
Thanks nekoichigo, I might do that, if I have the guts lol.... I really don't want to, but I guess Steini's right (Steini is my stepdad)
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Parents
Apr 24, 2006 4:14:21 GMT -5
Post by MuHa Feel the Wrath on Apr 24, 2006 4:14:21 GMT -5
ur mom will probably freak less if your honest. plus u know when ur not around ur dad will calm her down also so you have 2 to 1 she will come around and u guys will work it out. ur dad seems understanding
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