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Post by sleeplesshadow on Apr 24, 2006 8:19:11 GMT -5
...I know this sounds weird, but i am practically [glow=red,2,300]engaged[/glow] to that morocco guy that i was talkig abuot in another post. The other day he called me his future wife, he says that he is going to wait for me until i am old enough to marry him. He is 25. THe big problem is (aside from my being 16 and crap and he is 25) he is muslim and i don't know how i can adjust to his type of life-style, and how would a muslim and a christian marry? or have kids and raise them in an intermarriage? AHHHHHAHHHHHHABHHAAAA u am confused. Can anyone help me?
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Post by Rachel on Apr 24, 2006 11:53:10 GMT -5
I dont mean to be a bore..but you have actually met this man? Are you sure he is who he says he really is? I wouldnt get engaged to someone that you havent met before. Yes you may get on over the internet,but when your in each others company,it may be a different story. So if you really are serious (even though i smell something funny with this,tho its not my choice,or life) then just meet him first and see what happens. Dont rush into things. Your only 16
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Post by littlemikey on Apr 24, 2006 18:20:17 GMT -5
Well, remember, if he is Muslim he may have/want more then one wife :/ Please dont rush into marriage, you are far too young.
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Post by ¤Teen Vibe¤ on Apr 24, 2006 19:30:53 GMT -5
I don't think it's a good idea. Thats just my opnion though. My friend dated a muslim guy before and he wanted her to live downstairs and his family, which included his other wife and 3 kids live upstairs, He would also switch beds every other night. One night downstairs one night upstairs. They broke up. There is alway the possibility that he sees you as being younger so he's juicing you up to get married to gain citizenship in the states.
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Post by littlemikey on Apr 24, 2006 21:57:50 GMT -5
Just like in "A view from the bridge".... that was a good play.... Just dont do anything you will regret later, hun.
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Post by sleeplesshadow on Apr 25, 2006 8:14:02 GMT -5
Yah thanks...I realize the difference between the two religions and the two cultures. I know that there is a different air when you meet people face to face. I don't want to be commited yet...but...I don't know what to do...I like him (kinda, even though i don't know him really well). I have seen his pic, and we have talked on the phone. He parents died when he was younger and he is living iwth his sister...i don't know what to do
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Post by littlemikey on Apr 25, 2006 8:21:03 GMT -5
look, just seeing his picture isnt really enough to fall in love, I mean, seriously, you are too far apart to start a relationship that will be sucsessfull,....
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Erla
Cool User
[ss:BlueTwilight]
Posts: 129
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Post by Erla on Apr 25, 2006 15:04:06 GMT -5
Let me get this straight? You haven't met the guy, and you're engaged to him?
That's kinda weird, yeah? I mean, I'm not about to judge you here and although I do advice you to be cautious, since he's older and a muslim (although him being a muslim doesn't necessarily make him different....depends on what he's like), I wouldn't tell you not to go through with it, but...
Don't you think you should meet him before you decide that this is the man you wanna devote yourself to? Marriage is a pretty big deal, I truly don't believe that a big decision like that should be made over the internet.
And well, I just don't think that how you would raise your kids is the most important thing here....
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Post by sleeplesshadow on Apr 26, 2006 8:08:39 GMT -5
...I didn't turn him down, but i asked if we could wait. I hope to see him before i agree to marry him. Kids are i big thing in my life, and i know how hard it is to find you place in the religous department, when both the people you live with think that you will burn in hell if you don't commit yourself to their religion. So it plays big issue for me...And i want kids. Most kids around 14 already have kids in his culture...I will certainly be careful.
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Post by littlemikey on Apr 27, 2006 18:32:17 GMT -5
Thats good to know ^_^
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Post by vy on Apr 28, 2006 12:46:32 GMT -5
Dear Sleeplesshadow: Everyone is different and what is right for one person, might not be right for another. I don't know if this engagement plan is a good idea or not, but I do know that even though he has offered - you don't have to accept. You have the right to turn down an engagement. If you don't feel comfortable about it, just don't accept - you don't have to ask nothing. If you don't want to be engage, just tell him so. If he loves you as much as he says, he will respect that and back off. Good luck to you girl. Take it slow and steady. Life is long -
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Post by ♥ Victoria ♥ on Apr 30, 2006 13:10:54 GMT -5
Hey First of all, my post may sound bad. ..and gross some people out...but since all the posts here speak in a negative way toward the Muslim culture then let me give my point of view I have traveled to many Arab countries..even where that guy is from Morocco. I have met many Arab peoples and have studied many religions and Islam, culture and history as well. -Not all Muslim men marry many women (that was during our grand-grand mothers time) You can find that in the Saoudi Arabia, marry many women is a sign of wealth and power there, but during my travels in Morocco, marry many women is something very old. Think of it, how can a 15 man marry 2 or even more women at the same time..in 21 century..he must be one hell of a millionaire. Not all kids around 14 have kids. Have you ever been to an Arab country?. have you ever lived among Muslims?. Dont judge from what your ears hear from others hun, cause its not always true? Get married at 12 and have kids at 14 is no more something that happens everywhere. Excuse me, but I am Canadian, and many 14 years old girls get pregnant from a night out with their boyfriends... worse, 12 years old. Arabs: They aint all Muslims. To gain a Citizenship? This can be true, but what if this man really loves this girl? Unfortunately, many many and I say hell...many people around the States and Canada think very badly of the Muslim Culture, I am Christian, and I love my religion but wont be so racist toward another religion because the Media all it does, spit very wrong informations. Now lets go back to the topic: Your 16, still young to get married. We live no more in the Medieval ages. This guy can be saying the truth but he is 25. Keep leaving, enjoy your teen years. I am here typing and not very sure what advice I should give you... Just follow your heart, speak to your mother or someone older from your family. Everyone here is positive about one only thing: Dont get engaged now, dont give your life to a guy who can change his mind anytime...
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Post by sleeplesshadow on May 1, 2006 8:34:42 GMT -5
I'm Canadian and i am christian as well...I didn't mean to make everyone think that i am judging in any way. I had just done a crap load of research on the muslim culture. My boyfriend is muslim and he is arab...he told me this. Him and i both respect each other's religions. In no way was i trying to make things seem to be racist in any way...No i haven't been to Morocco, and havn't been to an arab cultures...but i want to learn about them...if you want you can PM me. THanks a lot
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Post by ♥ Victoria ♥ on May 1, 2006 13:57:20 GMT -5
Sure, I will tell you all I learned and all I know as well hun. As I said, do what you think is best to do but also talk to your fam..a member with whome you feel good, mom....dad or even do you know any friend at school who is from the same culture of that man?
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Post by Aviator on May 2, 2006 14:32:54 GMT -5
I'm Christian and Canadian, and what Victoria said is right.
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