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Post by guitarchic141 on Apr 3, 2006 7:14:40 GMT -5
I just feel like my life has been ripped apart just in the lsat two weeks. Firstly last tuesday I yelled at the head of the senior school and the head of the art department because i had been sick for the last three weeks and i supposedly didnt know the things i needed to for my school musical. Then that night before I went to bed I found out that my neighbour who I have grown up with had died earlier that day... and that was only the beginning! Later that week I found out that 'friend' were ignoring me, which isnt to bad because i am never at school due to subjects at other schools but when I am around I just go and sit and play the piano in the music centre because i feel that i just cdont belong anywhere anymore. Friday was kind of good because I went to youth and it was a really good night and i made a promise that I would try to be more prositive and if i cold keep my faith in God over the weekend (normally i am pretty bad and it just ebbs out because my family are kind of hostile towards religion) then I might finally do something about it and talk to someone. However, (dont you love those howevers) as i got dropped off at rowing on saturday my mum 'oh so casually' mentions that my aunt died that morning. So i had a funeral today (which i kind of missed because i didnt want to confront it) and one on wednesday, my birthday >_<; wow what a wonderful bday pressie... but thats not the best part. My Nan (from my mums side who her and i just dont get along with) is staying with us from tomorrow night until thursday... during my birthday!!! >_<; i dont know... i just cant stand it anymore... I'm just finally getting over cutting and I'm trying really hard to not do it at the moment but it is so hard... the only thing stopping me is the fact that im getting a blood test in a few weeks to see if i have glandular fever and last time i went to the doctor mum chucked a nut when she saw my wrist and the doctor tried talking to us about it... didnt really want that!!!
just wondering about any advice or info or ideas or anything... as the subject line says im just a tad lost without a map... >_<;
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Post by littlemikey on Apr 3, 2006 7:41:44 GMT -5
Hello there. My first part of advice for you is to not hurt yourself. Nothing can be solved from it. Also you need to know that we are going to do our best to help you. Your friends dying is not your fault. You should not feel responsible for the horrible events you have had to go through. Dont feel responsible, its not your fault. Remember that there are still people who love you and care for you. Remember those people and live for them, okay?
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Post by Sparkle on Apr 3, 2006 7:47:35 GMT -5
Hey hun, hugs. Well done for posting. You have had a very hard time, but the best thing we can do is work through the problems one at a time. 1) School. As you have been away for a long time, it will be hard catching up. What year are you in? Do you have many exams coming up? Borrow some ones notes from your class, and copy them up. About the music, see if you can go round to one of the people from your musical's houses, and practise. This iis probably the best thing to do if your teachers aren't being very responsive, but if you show you are trying, and practising, then they can't ask for more can they? Remember, this musical must be quite stressful for them too, some don't have any hard feelings towards them. OK? 2- Friends. Or as you said, 'friends.' They don't sound very nice friends, so your probably better off without them. Talk to more people in your musical, or at the music center, and if your old friends still ignore you, make new ones. You seem to have a lot of hobbys, so you should know lots of places to find new people! 3- Birthday - I know they are special, but make the best of it. And more people around = more presents . Just remember.. it's a birthday. You'll have more. 4- Cutting - Use this as an insentive not to do it again. then, once you go without doing it, you'll know you CAN do it! 5- Death- Sore subject for me, would talk about it, but have to go. Keep safe XO EDIT-Back. Sorry- had an appointment, had to dash. 5 - Death- This is one of the hardest things in life (no pun intended) we as humans have to deal with. And it must have been such a shock for you to have not just your neighbour, but your aunt die in a space so small. What littlemikey said is completley true. You are NOT to blame, and although this sounds harsh, there is absolutley nothing you can do. You talked about religion... 6 - Religion - ... maybe your belief in God will help you get through these hard times? God had a plan for these people, and although it will be very hard for you, it was best for them. Keep strong in your belief in God, and no matter who trys to stop you, keep up in your faith. Hope this has been a bit of help- any thing else you want to talk about pm me! Rootin for you babe! Sparle XO
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Post by ¤Teen Vibe¤ on Apr 3, 2006 15:15:05 GMT -5
Well welcome to the site!! Sparkle gave some really good advice and I don't have much to add to that. As for the deaths that have happened. I have lots of experiance with that unfourtanitly. I've had eight deaths in the last year and 3 prior to that so If your having a hard time. The best thing I know you can do is get some kind of grief counselling especially if some of these people were really close to you. Its really does help and its not easy dealing with it on your own. I'm really sorry to hear about you loss's. Please don't use cutting as a way to deal with it tho.
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Post by GrapeJuice on Apr 4, 2006 2:52:51 GMT -5
Im sorry for your loss's. I have not much to add to what has been said already. Just always rememeber things will get better. You will catch up in school and everything will figure its self out. It will be okay.
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Post by guitarchic141 on Apr 5, 2006 7:39:07 GMT -5
Remember that there are still people who love you and care for you. Remember those people and live for them, okay? Thankyou. I shall try too.
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Post by guitarchic141 on Apr 5, 2006 7:42:17 GMT -5
The best thing I know you can do is get some kind of grief counselling especially if some of these people were really close to you. Its really does help and its not easy dealing with it on your own. I'm really sorry to hear about you loss's. Please don't use cutting as a way to deal with it tho. I would but the problem is i dont like talking. i can type but no talking... also im one of those people who wont trust anyone for any reason. even my family >_<; im sorry! thankyou though
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Post by Sparkle on Apr 6, 2006 3:20:51 GMT -5
The only thing I can advise is to go to a counceller, say you don't like talking but print what you said in the first post out, and that way she'll know but you won't have to physically say any thing.
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Post by guitarchic141 on Apr 6, 2006 6:37:36 GMT -5
i would except that the councellor at my school is kind of a big mouth... >_< not the best trait for a councellor and i dont really want to fo to one outside of school because im paranoid my parents might find out... t'was awesome last time i went to the doctors and mum saw my wrists... >_<; (btw i was being sarcastic)
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Post by littlemikey on Apr 6, 2006 7:27:30 GMT -5
Is it still Miss Munt? She is good, you can trust her, she didnt tell anyone my secrets.
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Post by guitarchic141 on Apr 16, 2006 5:22:34 GMT -5
yes it still is miss munt... and shes a blabbing big mouth who has to go to a psych of her own because she cant deal with all the probs of the skL
sorry... kind of angry
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Post by MuHa Feel the Wrath on Apr 24, 2006 4:11:30 GMT -5
lol u 2 know each other or sumtin?
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Post by guitarchic141 on May 13, 2006 7:27:51 GMT -5
lol yeah. apart from i live in SA (south australia) and he lives in WA (western australia) about three hours plane ride away. kind of funny.
oh and littlemikey... ms munt is a cow... i went and saw her the other day and everything wrong with me has to do with school work.... -sigh- i really really dont like that woman.
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Brit.
Newbie
Leaving for Now→ Hopefully Coming back soon![ss:Euphoric]
Posts: 2
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Post by Brit. on Jun 29, 2006 11:48:53 GMT -5
whatever you do DON'T hurt yourself! I am not going to sit and preech, because I, myself, used to cut. I came to this website looking for help. And you know what? I found it. The people here are wonderful and really do care. Do something to occupy yourself ex: read a book, take a walk, listen to music obnoxiously loud, make something, play an instrument, anything! There's so much to do! I have been struggling a lot with wanting to die. Right now, the people here are helping me out. If i didn't find somewhere where i can talk to such wonderful and understanding people, I might have been dead already. I knew i needed help, and i got it right here Life is really hard. We can't do anything about it. I think over and over what is the point if people are going to die and people are going to be a-holes, etc. It is pretty hard to stop cutting, because I struggled a lot with it. I started in 8th grade, stopped in sort of mid-summer. I started cutting a little in 9th grade. I am now going into 10th grade. I have a wonderful school counselor who was helping me. There are people who care and want to help you. You're not alone! I care about you. I care about everyone on these boards that have serious problems. I love talking to people and trying to help them! And once again, I want to thank all of you who are trying to help me right now. You're wonderful people and I hope you know that P.S. Anyone can PM with whatever they have to say. I'll always listen
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