|
Post by Southern_Cowgirl on Jun 21, 2006 20:33:38 GMT -5
Every since my cousin died a year ago its been so hard not to think about dieing. I so depress and sad all the time because i guess i feel guilty. I had yelled at my cousin and had cursed him out about 5 days before his accident. I was going to say I'm sorry and i love you to him(i don't know why i even thought about that) before he left to get his pay check but something stop me and i wish now that i had said something because maybe he would had been later and wouldn't have gotten hit by that stupid car... See my family hasn't been the same either.... My uncle and 17 year old cousin has started drinking badly after Marks death... It hurts to know that my cousin is gone and i really wish i knew if he was in heaven because well Mark didn't believe in God and i ain't sure anymore..... My life has been so messed up but then again it has been kinda good because i met my bestest friend because of marks death and she has been going through hard stuff to but anyways i was wondering how i can get better and not be so depressed because well i have tried everything.... reading books that i was given and those help but it also makes me even more sad and i tired writing to him but it just makes me even more sadder.......... and most of the time i feel like no one understand even if i know that other teens are going through the same thing but idk anymore...........
|
|
|
Post by WilD CherrY on Jun 21, 2006 20:40:38 GMT -5
He knows that your sorry I hope you know that. You couldn't of prevented it from happening, things happen and sometimes we can't stop them. I'm very sorry for you loss it must be so incredably hard for you. Have you been to greif counselling that helps alot. Its good you have a friend there for you. *hug*
|
|
|
Post by Southern_Cowgirl on Jun 21, 2006 20:50:29 GMT -5
Thanks and i know he does but my gosh it sooo hard to accept the fact that he is gone and that my life won't ever be the same... after mark's death so much started happening and thats when i start getting angry and starting getting into trouble with people like fighting... but i have went to a school counselor and she had help alot and she gave me 2 books to read and those help me but also made me sad......
|
|
pyromanniac420
Getting there!
Take my advice, I don't use it anyway.
Posts: 86
|
Post by pyromanniac420 on Jun 22, 2006 1:46:25 GMT -5
loosing people suck big time sorry im no help i just know its really hard
|
|
|
Post by Southern_Cowgirl on Jun 22, 2006 9:10:55 GMT -5
yeah it does...... ever since i started middle school each summer i have lost something i loved........6th grade- my beloved dog Shade 7th grade- Mark 8th grade- my both of mark's brothers are movin away for a longgggggg time
|
|
|
Post by Italian Stallion on Jun 24, 2006 18:10:16 GMT -5
it sucks big time when someone die and I wish i could bring them back to stop u and everyone else from hurting.. i dont know what else to say just be strong
|
|
|
Post by Southern_Cowgirl on Jun 24, 2006 21:36:54 GMT -5
Thanks and I'm trying my hardest to stay strong exceptional for my Lil brother and sister who are so young and can be hurt easy and they don't understand.... thats why i don't cry around them or until i know they are in bed asleep
|
|
pyromanniac420
Getting there!
Take my advice, I don't use it anyway.
Posts: 86
|
Post by pyromanniac420 on Jul 7, 2006 20:58:04 GMT -5
aww thats so sad
|
|
|
Post by pretzelofconfusion on Jul 16, 2006 23:20:12 GMT -5
hon i know how you feel. i started getting cutting and got even more depressed a little over a year ago when my 14 year old cousin emilie died in a 4-wheeler accident. i am finally starting to get over it some and the only thing i can say is try to write i guess. discovering writing poetry has been amazing for me, as have my friends been a true blessing. i know emilie was a strong believer in god but now i myself am having a lot of trouble believing that there is ANY greater power at all. all you can think is how could that have happened? its all my fault. i hope her family is ok. its all just so hard!!! am i right in saying you are most likely thinking those things? please, please just have FAITH. you will get through it and when someone dies so young in a situation like that you need to understand there was nothing you could have done to stop it. nobody knew it was coming. your cousin knew you would get over your anger eventually. and he still knows that even if he was never here to hear it from you. you can still talk to him. you seem to have been fairly close to him, so when you are thinking things and talking you may already know the answers he would have given to your questions. he loves you very much, as do we all. please talk to someone soon or this will not go away. try writing in any form you like. you dont even have to share it with someone, but you can be letting any feeling out that you havent found a way to communicate before. please take these suggestions into consideration and feel free to email me at superkar_11@hotmail.com or pm me. i am trying to come online more often now. lotzoflove, karlee
|
|