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Post by MuHa Feel the Wrath on Mar 8, 2006 23:36:22 GMT -5
Hi Im Mike,
I recently came across this board and it looks pretty cool so Im going to give it a shot.
I've been dating my girlfriend since 9th grade and we are both one year out of graduation. She goes back and forth to visit her parent's about a hour and half drive away every so often. Sometimes I can't go due to work or school.
So the other day I herd a rumor that I wasn't suppose to hear. Let's say maybe I was ease dropping a little bit. This is what I herd:
That my girlfriend is anerexic and is into drugs like cocane.
Now I don't see how this can be true because I never see her act differently ever. Is she able to cover it up? I mean she is skinny and could use a little meat but I would never think shes anerexic. I've seen her eat before lots.
The person I herd saying the rumor was her best friend from second grade. She was whispering it to my girlfriends other friend.
"Tayla better hope Mike doesn't find out what happened on her visit. She went over board this weekend" then the other girl whispered back " Was she doing Coke?" and she responded with a "yes". Then the other girl said "she needs to stop or she will die being anerexic and all."
Then I couldn't hear anything after that. I really don't know what to do or say. Do you think its true? Can she hide it? What are some signs? Am I missing something? What do I do?
I know lots of questions and this is long but Im soo confused and lost I don't know what to say to her anymore when I see her.
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Post by papercuttsinthehea on Mar 8, 2006 23:44:14 GMT -5
Hummm. Thats a tuff situation. And I'm not sure about 'covering it up'. Ive never herd of anyone really covering it up without being caught sometime, but maybe there is. I can't reallt say its true and I cant say its false either. To be truthly honest her friends could be over exaggerating and just talking smack. Maybe they knew you were there or something. I dunno. But at the same time it can be true. My suggestion is to keep an eye on her. See if you see any signs of eating very little or any signs of drugs. And I mean that kind of watching is like real up close and personal watching. You would have to keep an eye on her all the time when your not at school or working. I also think that if you really start to get worried and can't tell if she is or isn't then you should talk to her about it. If you've been together since the 9th grade it shouldn't be to hard to talk to her about something like that. Just tell her you over heard her friends talking and that they said she was anerxic and does drugs. She what she does. If she loves you she'll talk to you about it and tell you whether or not its true. But you dont have to take my advice. You may do whatever you please. I hope I helped and I wish the best of luck to you.
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Post by pretzelofconfusion on Mar 9, 2006 10:46:18 GMT -5
that IS a tough situation. i suppose it is possible those things are going on but then again you guys have been together so long i'm sure you would have noticed at least something a little out of the ordinary before now.. i am a girl so i can say firsthand that girls are evil . what i mean is if they get in little fights it can easily turn into one another starting rumors, saying bad things, etc. also do either of those girls have any reason to have something against you or her that would make them say things like that? sticking with the possibility that the things said are true, i would say that if you really want/need to find out what is going on you should probably keep an eye on her. not real noticably to make her suspicious but enough to get an idea whats going on that you might not know about. another thing is that you have the advantage of having been with her since 9th grade so hopefully it is a little easier to talk to her and just be straightforward. say that you heard something and you dont want to believe it but you really need to know the truth and you will understand and trust anything she tells you. with her knowing you so well i think it would be very hard for her to keep something that big from you and if you ask her face-to-face she might open up a little and be completely honest, as long as she knows that you always are honest with her.... hope i helped some and good luck!! -karlee
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Post by -‰KillerStyle‰- on Mar 9, 2006 20:27:33 GMT -5
Don't listen to the friends. Talk to her and find out from her. Look for evidence of her doing stuff.
Runny nose all the time but no cold, I look up some more signs and get back to you.
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Post by stars2mind on Mar 9, 2006 23:42:24 GMT -5
yeah i agree you should talk to her and tell her that you love her but i know that she will react as if you believe other ppls word over her so just tell her that your curious about it and that you will love her no matter what. it thats true
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Post by aod on Mar 13, 2006 1:13:43 GMT -5
do what i do i would say i stumbled on some rumors about you and i want to know if there true or not. look 50/50 either right or wrong besides why would a best friend from second grade want to do that. sounds like someone doesnt like you two together maybe your best friend is trying to break you two up and date you next. but then wouldnt someone ask themselfs why wait on someone when you can be missing on someone great. only good hardass reasons would work for that question. i better stop now before i end up with a page and a half of questions and me answering them
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Post by stars2mind on Mar 13, 2006 14:17:48 GMT -5
hey if you discover that these things are true, dont just dump her...cause that wont help her at all, she could be suicidal at the thought of her body and things.. you know work through it with her and tell her that you love her....so she could get the feeing that she can beat it....
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Post by Dregond [Gone] on Mar 13, 2006 14:30:23 GMT -5
i sujest takeing her out mroe on dates that way she'll have to eat:P sometimes the simple things solve the big problems, just saying "i love you" can solve a few, but jsut saying the words wont do much , you gota show it. and dont just listen to people, face her and find out on your time with her.
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Post by ¤Teen Vibe¤ on Mar 13, 2006 19:03:03 GMT -5
Be upfront and ask her when you see her. Try not to get mad if she is doing these things she probably having a hard time as it is.
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Post by MuHa Feel the Wrath on Mar 14, 2006 4:31:10 GMT -5
Well, I was up front and asked her the only problem was that she freaked out saying that I was stalking her and rambling on about something else. I didn't know what to do so I told her she knows where to find me if she ever wants to talk. I called her the next day a few times but she just picked up and hung up. I was asked her when I found some shit in the bathroom on a mirror in the cupboard. I don't know why she flipped out tho I was really calm and stayed calm the whole time.( I'm dint really get loud ever) but, yeah thats it I still haven't heard from her. I emailed her and texted her but nothing still.
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Post by Dregond [Gone] on Mar 14, 2006 4:48:49 GMT -5
shes sad, she just wants to be the gril other guys would like adn she wants to stay perfct for them, she worries to much abt what other peopel think deep inside..thats shes worried abt what you think of her ...shes afrid to face her self and look in the mirror and say "this is me" or be looked at by someone and say "can you love me" ..
what she needs is for you to do is to go up to her in a few day, look her inthe eye and say"i love you" and prove it to her that you dont care what she looks like and for you to explin to her that, her life is her own , her death likewise, always and forever her own and nothign anybody says or does can cahnge that and she must fight her ground insted of adapting to what people want....people will always want things...its endless.
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Post by MuHa Feel the Wrath on Mar 14, 2006 4:52:41 GMT -5
Well I told her that I loved her and I didn't think she was "fat" I told her that I liked her just how she was but she kept saying "Leave" "Go" etc.. she wouldnt even listen to me. So Its already been about 4-5 days She still hasn't wanted to talk to me.
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Post by Dregond [Gone] on Mar 14, 2006 4:58:17 GMT -5
they will always push you away because they fear to face you..you have to face and get her to talk... just catch her alone and sit down with her.....dont say anything just give her a few moments and say " hi , i missed you" and give her a big smile. dont mention anythign atb being fat or anything, just get close to her and talk..if you get her to smile , you made it past first base ... then slowly bring in the topic
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Post by MuHa Feel the Wrath on Mar 14, 2006 5:03:22 GMT -5
Thanks Im going to try that tomorrow and see what happens
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Post by aod on Mar 14, 2006 6:38:51 GMT -5
mike also take note about the risk your taking if she ever developed the guts she can charge for harassment but then again with this case it can be diffrent one of my questions is that is she with her friends when shes telling you like go away and shit. also
Denial. Most couples break up over it so dont do it Lying Second most couples break up over it so dont do it Verbal Harassment Third most couples break up for it so dont do it more of these rules are in the book called "AOD's Book of Shadowed realationships"
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Post by Dregond [Gone] on Mar 14, 2006 6:51:52 GMT -5
how did we jump into law suits ?
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Post by aod on Mar 14, 2006 7:09:40 GMT -5
i'm saying it can how would you like someone comeing up to you all the time and bugging you. you can charge with harassment
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