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Post by Will on Oct 3, 2006 22:58:45 GMT -5
Hi. First let me reiterate that I am new to these forums. I'm 16, male and have a bit of a problem. Maybe some of you can answer my questions.
As I said, I'm new here. I looked around the forums. In particular this section. What I noticed startled me. It seems as if 13 and 14 year olds are having sex. They are asking sexual questions. They talk about their sexual experiences.
We live in a world where sex is everywhere. It permeates the very air we breathe. It's advertised everywhere.
That doesn't give us the right to do it all the time.
Is it just me, or is anyone else worried about the state of our world when 13 and 14 year olds are having sex all the time? Why must they persist? Why do they insist on dong it? Why does everyone want it? Why does everyone ask for it? Why does everyone get it? Can't we go back to being normal? I remember when people weren't so obsessed with sex. Why is it happening now? Why do we hve 13 and 14 year olds having sex all the time?!
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Post by Beautiful Disaster on Oct 3, 2006 23:08:55 GMT -5
Because girls are maturing faster now then they have in the years before. The puberty rate for a girl is now 12/13/14 before it was 17/18/19 yrs old. Television promotes it to sell merchandise, everywhere you look its about sex in some way. They are getting exposed to it at a much earlier age. You could stop your children from watching TV but what happens when the go to school and their friends are talking about it? You can educate them the best you can but they will still go and try it maybe because they want to or because of peer pressure. Its their choice and really theres no way we can stop someone from doing something unless you lock them up in a room. Now a days its everywhere and it doesn't look like it will be going away anytime soon unfortunately.
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Post by littlemikey on Oct 3, 2006 23:30:48 GMT -5
I sure know the feeling, the whole world seems to have matured far too quickly.
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Post by Will on Oct 3, 2006 23:35:56 GMT -5
Just because it's everywhere is no excuse. I know I will never try drugs, but the pressure is still there. Why am I necessarily different from others? If I can survive temptation others can as well. Same goes for sex. Just because it's everywhere does not give people a right to do it.
I worry about the next generation. The generation that will be born to single parents. A baby will be born today to a 13 year old girl, and her boyfriend will leave her. She will have no one. Maybe she'll make her parents take care of the kid. That's not their responsibility. If the kid grows up, who's going to tell him his sick, f**ed up family history? "Sorry son, your daddy was 13 when he left your mommy (who was 12). You were an accident. Because of you your mother dropped out of high school. Look at where she is now."
Just because sex is everywhere does not mean people should do it all the time, if ever.
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Post by littlemikey on Oct 3, 2006 23:42:21 GMT -5
Just because it's everywhere is no excuse. I know I will never try drugs, but the pressure is still there. Why am I necessarily different from others? If I can survive temptation others can as well. Same goes for sex. Just because it's everywhere does not give people a right to do it. I worry about the next generation. The generation that will be born to single parents. A baby will be born today to a 13 year old girl, and her boyfriend will leave her. She will have no one. Maybe she'll make her parents take care of the kid. That's not their responsibility. If the kid grows up, who's going to tell him his sick, f**ed up family history? "Sorry son, your daddy was 13 when he left your mommy (who was 12). You were an accident. Because of you your mother dropped out of high school. Look at where she is now." Just because sex is everywhere does not mean people should do it all the time, if ever. I agree. I know the pressure is around a lot more now then it used to be. Most of my friends at school keep talking about how great sex is, and pressure me to have sex. Peer pressure is one thing that I can avoid from my enemies (harrassment ect) but from my friends it is much harder to avoid, although I have been sucsessful thus far.
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Post by Will on Oct 4, 2006 0:04:05 GMT -5
Exactly. You see my point. My friends tell me things as well. Wow, we could almost be in the same group at school! And in a way I admire your control.
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Post by littlemikey on Oct 4, 2006 0:10:02 GMT -5
Exactly. You see my point. My friends tell me things as well. Wow, we could almost be in the same group at school! And in a way I admire your control. Thanks, Mate
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Post by biancasaur on Oct 4, 2006 1:44:33 GMT -5
In my opinion, the reason we are all so crazy about sex, and we all feel such pressure to do it at a young age, is precisely because our society is NOT truly open about sexuality. If we were able to talk openly about sexuality and young people were truly, openly educated about sex -- not just about the reproductive functions and diseases, but about sexual pleasure and the emotions involved -- I doubt there would be such hype and mystery surrounding sex for young people. (Of course, we would all still want to do it -- because sexual urges are natural and, I believe, universal.)
I also agree with what someone said above -- puberty comes earlier these days. There was a time when people started puberty at an average age of 16; now it's more like 12.
And of course, I'll add that I personally believe there's nothing morally/ethically wrong with having sex, even at a young age, if you are being safe and everyone is consenting to what's going on. Yes, I do think an 18 year old is probably more able to make sexual decisions than a 14 year old. But if a 14 year old makes a choice to have safe, consensual sex with someone else around their same age, why is the sex they're having necessarily bad or wrong?
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Post by Will on Oct 4, 2006 4:18:26 GMT -5
Because this is why sex has an age limit. Children don't know what they're doing.
Oh, I'm all for education. Looking around these forums I'm amazed some people don't know certain things.That's okay, this is why people ask questions. Schools need more of an input. People are afraid of saying 'dirty words'.
But education is different. If you open the floodgates, and tell children (and I mean children) that sex is okay for them at their age, we are going to slowly degenerate into a world where there is no education, there is no television, no sport, nothing. Just sex. All day, every day. Because it's a human 'urge' and therefore this makes it okay. In theory. And that's just wrong.
This is why marriage exists; so two people can have sex in a way that isn't sinful or lust-driven, but rather a manifestation of love. What we have today instead is two 12 year olds having sex to 'try' it out, to see what the fuss is all about. No one should have that kind of mindset.
Why all this fuss about sex anyway? Who necessarily said everyone has to do it? And does it make you a better person if you do? I think it's overrated and we don't need this kind of pressure.
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Viper
Junior Member
[ss:BlueTwilight]
Posts: 167
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Post by Viper on Oct 4, 2006 14:58:00 GMT -5
I sooo agree with you Will. People just cant controll there feelings plus there parants are never around for them, never tell them these things, so most kids now days are just raising themselfs.
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Post by biancasaur on Oct 6, 2006 16:42:46 GMT -5
Whoops, edited, I made a mistake. If you open the floodgates, and tell children (and I mean children) that sex is okay for them at their age, we are going to slowly degenerate into a world where there is no education, there is no television, no sport, nothing. Just sex. All day, every day. Because it's a human 'urge' and therefore this makes it okay. In theory. And that's just wrong. I disagree. There are plenty of people who have sex -- a lot of sex -- and they don't quit their jobs, stop going to school, stop playing sports, and just stay home and have sex all day. Sex does not bring a society down that way. Even if people start having sex at a very young age -- which I don't think they should, I'm with you on that one. This is why marriage exists; so two people can have sex in a way that isn't sinful or lust-driven, but rather a manifestation of love. What we have today instead is two 12 year olds having sex to 'try' it out, to see what the fuss is all about. No one should have that kind of mindset. It sounds like you have strong beliefs about marriage, which I don't share. To me, the only sex that can be "sinful" is rape, coerced sex, or sex without informed consent. But I don't think we'll agree on this anytime soon. My question is: what is wrong with having sex to try it out? Okay, I will grant you that 12 year olds are not going to be able to have safe sex, in almost all cases, and they probably don't understand the possible consequences. But let's say they are 16 instead, and unmarried. Let's say they are using condoms and they are emotionally mature people, which a 16 year old can be, even if not all are. What is wrong with having sex in order to see what sex is like? What about a man and woman who are 40? Assuming they are emotionally mature adults, should they also never try sex just to try it? Why all this fuss about sex anyway? Who necessarily said everyone has to do it? And does it make you a better person if you do? I think it's overrated and we don't need this kind of pressure. I agree that nobody should tell anyone they have to have sex if they don't want to. It's perfectly fine to NOT have sex, and sex certainly does not make you a better person. I'm sorry that you've gotten these messages from people... they've got no idea what they're talking about!
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[Beefy]
Getting there!
[ss:Coming Soon]
Posts: 92
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Post by [Beefy] on Oct 6, 2006 20:00:59 GMT -5
I highly doubt [everything] will stop and we will become obssessed with sex and sex only. To have sex you need energy to get energy you need food and for food you need money, for money you need work. Even [if] food and housing came free they still need money to keep up everything for everyone. That would never happen and is far fetched [imo] [/size]
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Barbaro
Junior Member
House yo....[ss:Coming Soon 2]
Posts: 152
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Post by Barbaro on Oct 7, 2006 14:52:16 GMT -5
Personaly, I don't see why sex is such a "hush hush" topic.Or as much as it is. Because, people do it to show love, and it is just like kissing, just way more, I dunno, way more personal maybe? At school, we havn't had sex ed in 2 years, and this year (freshmen) I will see people having sex. To me, I don't care, I don't see the problem. it is what people do. it is how everyone in the world was made. And most of the people in the world will do it. Since it is so "hush hush" kids whisper about it, and are scared to talk to parents about, know little, then do it, and become pregnant! If we where more exposed to it, I think at first people will be like sex! all the time, then they'll be like, what ever. And the rate will go down.
I've never understood why sex, and being nude is such a big deal. Or religious people, if God wanted us in Cloaths, he would have made us in cloaths. Sure, I do think anyone younger than 18 shouldn't do it, but still, they should know about it. Heck, I am almost 15, I can't wait to do it, but I want to have the right person, and place to do it. I don't want to be dating someone for 4 weeks then do it, who knows what can happen. I want to do it when I am married, and I want a kid. I don't see how people want to do it so badly though, at my age. I mean, accualy wants to do it with anyone. Like I said, I want to, but I can wait. I know it is a big price to pay.
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Post by Will on Oct 9, 2006 4:21:39 GMT -5
Alright. It sounds like some people are mis-reading me somehow. Let me reiterate: I want to know why people are having sex at an early age. I want to know because frankly, it disgusts me.
I am 100% FOR educating children. Sex should not be a "hush-hush" topic, as Barbaro thankfully told us (twice). Sex should not be mysterious, nor am I saying I want it to be.
I just want to know why the general population has degenerated so much in the past couple of decades, and if there's anything that can be done about it.
We live in a very superficial society. Unfortunately, there are many, many people who equate sex = cool. They have sex because it's 'cool', because it brings them status amongst their dull-witted friends. These people are everywhere and I am sick of being pressured to do things I do NOT want to do. This pressure is all around everyone. Advertisements, movies, everything has the general message that sex = cool = fun = something everyone should do. And if you don't do it, you're a loser and no one likes you. This is the message I'm getting.
The worst part is, when I talk to people on the Internet. These are 12, 13, 14 year olds who say things like: omg sex is illy cool rite? omg lol I want sex!!11! lol omg serisly gime sex lol! I mean, doesn't this bother anyone, even a little bit?
Well, my gripe is with people who do have sex at an early age. This is my problem. I want to know why people feel compelled to do this. Why?
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Post by -‰KillerStyle‰- on Oct 9, 2006 15:36:12 GMT -5
Well Teens are exposed to it at a earlier age with little or no education. Its Taboo so they are more curious about it so they try it.
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Post by Southern_Cowgirl on Oct 9, 2006 16:39:39 GMT -5
i think that 13 & 14 years old are having sex because of pressure from their boyfriends and other people. Most girls hate to tell their boyfriends No cuz they dont want them to break up with them and stuff like that. Sometimes they just little *beep*s and very *friendly* persons(i aint calling anyone that im just saying)... Mostly girls who are having sex at this age had grown up in a bad home or they went through sexual abuse when they were younger but that is just my opinion
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Post by biancasaur on Oct 9, 2006 21:23:54 GMT -5
I just want to know why the general population has degenerated so much in the past couple of decades, and if there's anything that can be done about it. How do we know that young people weren't this obsessed with sex a long time ago? Sure, we've all heard that in the "good old days," nobody had premarital sex, and certainly no young people were thinking those "naughty thoughts." But none of us were there. I mean, what generation are you comparing ours to? Okay, I definitely agree with you that "sex is everywhere" these days -- just turn on a television set. Yep, this IS the one thing that's very different from past generations -- the media's images of sex. And yes, that disgusts me. But not because of the sex itself. It's because it's a totally fake version of sex, and it's being used to sell things. Not to mention how much it objectifies women. What disgusts me is that young people are growing up thinking that what they're seeing on MTV is an accurate portrayal of sex, and it's definitely NOT. Unfortunately, there are many, many people who equate sex = cool. They have sex because it's 'cool', because it brings them status amongst their dull-witted friends. These people are everywhere and I am sick of being pressured to do things I do NOT want to do. Again, I'm sorry you've been getting this message... all I can say is that, I hope these people grow up one day and come into the real world, and become adults! I guess all you can do is try to find some more mature people to talk to. People who think you're a) cool or b) a loser based on your sexual experience are not living in the real world. As for your big question, Why do people feel compelled to have sex? ... Well, I don't want to ambush you with personal questions, but are you saying you've never felt sexual desire? I think most people want to have sex simply due to their physical sex drive, and I do believe it's possible to have a sex drive at a very young age -- let's say 13 or 14. As we know, people are developing a lot earlier these days. Then again, it sounds like most of the people you're talking about want to have sex because it's some sort of badge of honor and it will make them "cool." In that case I'd definitely point to the messages that those people are getting from the media, from their friends and families.
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